When you first split up after a long relationship, I find that there is often a queue of people ready to offer helpful advice such as “there are plenty more fish in the sea” and “don’t worry, time is a great healer”. Both of these may well be right but you absolutely don’t want to hear them when you’re half an inch from a complete and utter emotional breakdown.
As an utterly non-violent person (I’ve never hit anyone in my entire life), even I got to the point at the tail end of last year where I was ready to punch the next person who told me that time was a great healer… I already know that it is, I’ve lost relationships before, but there’s something about these cliches when you’re in your darkest moments of despair that seems to be extraordinarily insensitive and cruel – right up until your addiction to love breaks (as it did for me recently) and then suddenly, I find myself parroting the same cliches back to people as reasons why I’m clearly so much better than I was a month ago.
Hell, I can even laugh about it now. Maybe I ought to order myself one of these.
karalina said,
February 11, 2007 @ 5:58 pm
Re: “time is a great healer” or also known as “Time heals all wounds”.
I think it’s a crock of shit. Someone once said to me the opposite, “Time wounds all heals.” Time can be great, IF you use it wisely. This same person told me that it’s what you do with that time that heals you.
I agree.
Also, regarding smoking in bars which you mentioned in your previous post…We’ve had that going on in NYC for awhile now. As a social smoker, I was (at first) pissed at the idea that we’d have to go OUTSIDE to enjoy killing ourselves. Can you imagine the horror? God forbid! Kidding, of course. It is a good thing. At least when I come home from a night out I don’t smell like an overstuffed ashtray anymore! But I can’t say that it made me smoke any less, though…
tentickles said,
February 11, 2007 @ 6:12 pm
[time is a great healer]: I think it’s a crock of shit. Someone once said to me the opposite, “Time wounds all heals.” Time can be great, IF you use it wisely. This same person told me that it’s what you do with that time that heals you.
Now those are words of wisdom. I’m more spooked about figuring out whether any of the things that I am doing is making good use of that time. Still, other than on sundays, I’m back to lusting after the opposite sex so I guess I’m making some sort of progress… If I can just deal with the confusion about what is right and wrong, I’ll be sorted.
With regards to the NYC ban and it’s utter non-effect on your smoking, DARN! I was really hoping that might be a sneaky stealth way of accidentally cutting back and making giving up just a bit easier. Ho hum :-)
Edit: Hello, by the way :) Hope your day has been most excellent :-)